Read The Forum Rules: We have a clear set of rules to keep the forum running smoothly. Click here to review them.

Post Reply 
Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
Author Message
No More Mr. Soy Boy Offline
Banned

Posts: 581
Joined: Jul 2018
Post: #1
Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
I don't know if you agree but to me it seems like most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months (and when I've searched on Google, it seems like most other people agree with this).

I wondered why this is? And if it's usually the woman or the man breaking things up?

I wanted to put my own theory about this and see what others here think.

My theory is that it's usually the women breaking up (agree or not?) and it usually has to do with the woman starting to perceive herself as better than you, frankly speaking.

Usually it's women who seem to get all loved up about the guy in the beginning and she can often start to brag about the guy to her friends and she can raise in status (since women often are definied by the men they're with and single women can often be seen as a bit lower status).

But after a few months, the guy starts to get emotionally attached too and it can turn the woman in the opposite direction because before, she was the one investing more into the relationship and kind of chasing his commitment. Eventually she starts to perceive her value to above him and thinks she can do better and the relationship goes down South.

Let me hear what do you think about this? What is the most common reason most relationships don't last that long?
01-29-2020 10:26 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 1 user Likes No More Mr. Soy Boy's post:
gework
PapayaTapper Online
Crow
*****
Gold Member

Posts: 5,446
Joined: Mar 2014
Reputation: 153
Post: #2
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
12 years worth of discussions and nearly a million posts on this topic just got deleted and you ask this now?

Laugh3

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
(This post was last modified: 01-29-2020 10:39 PM by PapayaTapper.)
01-29-2020 10:35 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 7 users Like PapayaTapper's post:
Number one bummer, Augustus_Principe, lonewolf1992, AntoniusofEfa, Built to Fade, Handsome Creepy Eel, RDF
No More Mr. Soy Boy Offline
Banned

Posts: 581
Joined: Jul 2018
Post: #3
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
(01-29-2020 10:35 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  12 years worth of discussions and nearly a million posts on this topic just got deleted and you ask this now?

I know, right?

But I've only seen discussions kind of relating to the topic and not really specific to my question as to exactly why shit ends in 3-5 months.
01-29-2020 10:41 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 1 user Likes No More Mr. Soy Boy's post:
lonewolf1992
kinjutsu Offline
Pelican
****

Posts: 1,659
Joined: Jul 2011
Reputation: 18
Post: #4
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
Simple answer is the "honeymoon" phase of the relationship is over. The other person isn't brand new and exciting ie doesn't bring her tingles. The girl gets bored and finds a new guy to "date"

My Twitter

You can't get lucky all the time, but you can be smart everyday though...
01-30-2020 04:08 AM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 5 users Like kinjutsu's post:
MichaelWitcoff, Laner, questor70, Tactician, Built to Fade
MajorStyles Offline
Kingfisher
***

Posts: 919
Joined: Jul 2014
Reputation: 8
Post: #5
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
Usually, the first argument surfaces around that time. Most people are unable to overcome this initial hurdle, and the situation descends quickly.

From my experience, in modern Western countries, this usually means that the woman is called out on some aspect of her behavior. This shatters her ego, since she's been told that people must empower her, uplift her, etc. She will look at this incident as abusive or controlling, when it's really just about the man trying to assert his boundries.

"Action still preserves for us a hope that we may stand erect." - Thucydides (from History of the Peloponnesian War)
01-30-2020 08:59 AM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 14 users Like MajorStyles's post:
Graft, No More Mr. Soy Boy, Samseau, Bitter End, DJ-Matt, lonewolf1992, nek, Sankt Michael, Caractacus Potts, Windom Earle, Speculation, gework, Leonard D Neubache, Built to Fade
redbeard Offline
Hummingbird
*****
Gold Member

Posts: 3,035
Joined: Jan 2014
Reputation: 72
Post: #6
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
I have a hypothesis that women leave because they subconsciously think the male is infertile. Think about it. If you’re having sex with someone for months, years at a time...there’s a strong chance she gets pregnant, right?

Women know this in their hindbrain, then come up with some convenient excuse to leave. Look at any couple that has been “dating” for years. There’s usually hints of resentment in her for not being pregnant.

This is another reason why avoiding premarital sex is a smart move. When you don’t have sex, it’s easier to keep the fires going since there’s so much sexual tension. You have a next step to take together.

"Every saint has a past, every sinner a future."
01-30-2020 10:06 AM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 11 users Like redbeard's post:
MichaelWitcoff, kel, Augustus_Principe, Laner, nek, Eusebius, Sankt Michael, No More Mr. Soy Boy, Tactician, Leonard D Neubache, Built to Fade
Augustus_Principe Offline
Robin
*

Posts: 135
Joined: May 2019
Reputation: 5
Post: #7
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
(01-30-2020 10:06 AM)redbeard Wrote:  I have a hypothesis that women leave because they subconsciously think the male is infertile. Think about it. If you’re having sex with someone for months, years at a time...there’s a strong chance she gets pregnant, right?

Women know this in their hindbrain, then come up with some convenient excuse to leave. Look at any couple that has been “dating” for years. There’s usually hints of resentment in her for not being pregnant.

This is another reason why avoiding premarital sex is a smart move. When you don’t have sex, it’s easier to keep the fires going since there’s so much sexual tension. You have a next step to take together.

This is why doing God's will is the best course to take. Other's have mention the honeymoon phase being over (true), the man getting too attached (also true) etc. The God-pill fixes all of this. When a man focuses on God more than his woman, the woman will automatically be more attracted to him and respect the man since he is not "needy" of her.

Based on my own experience, as well as those that i know of and read, I am not surprised that the vast majority of modern day, secular relationship end up in failure. Those that somehow make it to marriage still have a high chance of failure. When we are not focused on God(lack of interior life), it shows in our everyday, exterior life. We worship women (sex), we lack the drive to succeed because we have reached our destination (again,sex). The woman, although unable to describe this, knows it and starts resenting the man, eventually with her ending it.

Thankfully that era is over and we have turned a new chapter.
(This post was last modified: 01-30-2020 02:02 PM by Augustus_Principe.)
01-30-2020 02:01 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 4 users Like Augustus_Principe's post:
No More Mr. Soy Boy, gework, doc holliday, Built to Fade
Samseau Offline
Owl
******
Gold Member

Posts: 14,671
Joined: Mar 2010
Reputation: 293
Post: #8
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
(01-30-2020 02:01 PM)Augustus_Principe Wrote:  
(01-30-2020 10:06 AM)redbeard Wrote:  I have a hypothesis that women leave because they subconsciously think the male is infertile. Think about it. If you’re having sex with someone for months, years at a time...there’s a strong chance she gets pregnant, right?

Women know this in their hindbrain, then come up with some convenient excuse to leave. Look at any couple that has been “dating” for years. There’s usually hints of resentment in her for not being pregnant.

This is another reason why avoiding premarital sex is a smart move. When you don’t have sex, it’s easier to keep the fires going since there’s so much sexual tension. You have a next step to take together.

This is why doing God's will is the best course to take. Other's have mention the honeymoon phase being over (true), the man getting too attached (also true) etc. The God-pill fixes all of this. When a man focuses on God more than his woman, the woman will automatically be more attracted to him and respect the man since he is not "needy" of her.

Based on my own experience, as well as those that i know of and read, I am not surprised that the vast majority of modern day, secular relationship end up in failure. Those that somehow make it to marriage still have a high chance of failure. When we are not focused on God(lack of interior life), it shows in our everyday, exterior life. We worship women (sex), we lack the drive to succeed because we have reached our destination (again,sex). The woman, although unable to describe this, knows it and starts resenting the man, eventually with her ending it.

Thankfully that era is over and we have turned a new chapter.

Unfortunately, I fear we have at least another 20 years before this era burns out. There is much ruin in a nation. Other than that, you are spot on!

Contributor at Return of Kings. You can follow me on Gab.
01-30-2020 02:56 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 4 users Like Samseau's post:
MajorStyles, Sooth, gework, Built to Fade
Augustus_Principe Offline
Robin
*

Posts: 135
Joined: May 2019
Reputation: 5
Post: #9
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
True Samseau. For the west as a whole, we definitely have another decade at least or more until this burns out. On a more micro level, those of us who were involved in learning game, red pill knowledge, before finally turning to God, have at least turned the page.
01-30-2020 03:57 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Rob Banks Offline
Kingfisher
***

Posts: 726
Joined: Oct 2016
Reputation: 12
Post: #10
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
↑ I'm not sure if society will "burn out" and revert to traditionalism anytime soon. I feel like the existence of modern technology kind of makes it impossible (or at least really, really difficult) for that to happen.
01-30-2020 04:19 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 1 user Likes Rob Banks's post:
nek
Mizuki1130 Offline
Pigeon

Posts: 17
Joined: Oct 2019
Reputation: 0
Post: #11
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
(01-29-2020 10:41 PM)No More Mr. Soy Boy Wrote:  
(01-29-2020 10:35 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  12 years worth of discussions and nearly a million posts on this topic just got deleted and you ask this now?

I know, right?

But I've only seen discussions kind of relating to the topic and not really specific to my question as to exactly why shit ends in 3-5 months.

deleted?
01-30-2020 04:35 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Sooth Online
Pelican
****
Gold Member

Posts: 1,268
Joined: Feb 2015
Reputation: 18
Post: #12
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
It's because the majority don't understand the purpose of a man and a women coming together.

The purpose of marriage is to honor God by acting out His divine qualities (faithfulness, selflessness, etc etc) and giving us a chance to know them through action + reproduction.

Again, the majority have turned their backs on God, so what is the purpose of a man and woman coming together? Happiness, lust, money, ... All temporary, so when it wanes there is nothing to stay together for.

Adultery and divorce is not a sin because it hurts peoples feelings - it's because God is ultimately faithful, and we are to imitate that.
(This post was last modified: 01-30-2020 05:05 PM by Sooth.)
01-30-2020 04:49 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 3 users Like Sooth's post:
Rob Banks, gework, Augustus_Principe
Repo Offline
Hummingbird
*****

Posts: 3,418
Joined: Feb 2015
Reputation: 24
Post: #13
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
(01-29-2020 10:41 PM)No More Mr. Soy Boy Wrote:  
(01-29-2020 10:35 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  12 years worth of discussions and nearly a million posts on this topic just got deleted and you ask this now?

I know, right?

But I've only seen discussions kind of relating to the topic and not really specific to my question as to exactly why shit ends in 3-5 months.

My experience has been the exact opposite. 3-5 months is about the time that the girl starts telling you or hinting that she loves you and that she wants to take things further. If this isn't happening its probably 1 of 2 things, or possibly both:

1) She just wants to sleep around and try new exciting guys, as kinjutsu said. If its this, you should try to filter better and not engage in an exclusive relationship with this type of girl.

2) Your game gets weak after putting your best foot forward for the first month or two, and she is observing discrepancies between how you initially portrayed yourself and how you actually live your life. The topic of inner game is highly relevant here.
01-30-2020 09:18 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 3 users Like Repo's post:
No More Mr. Soy Boy, Graft, doc holliday
questor70 Offline
Ostrich
****

Posts: 2,427
Joined: Jan 2017
Reputation: 22
Post: #14
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
Dating is traditionally a try-before-you-buy proposition. It's usually the woman who is supposed to come at you at some point and say "ok, so, um, what are we?" That makes it so that you have to get on the engagement and marriage track or break up. That's why dating usually has a short lifecycle, because there are a lot more people out there who make a good F-buddy than a spouse and therefore people serial-date their way through life like working through a buffet-table.
01-30-2020 11:20 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 2 users Like questor70's post:
Graft, Augustus_Principe
nek Offline
Pelican
****

Posts: 1,323
Joined: Nov 2012
Reputation: 16
Post: #15
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
(01-30-2020 08:59 AM)MajorStyles Wrote:  Usually, the first argument surfaces around that time. Most people are unable to overcome this initial hurdle, and the situation descends quickly.

From my experience, in modern Western countries, this usually means that the woman is called out on some aspect of her behavior. This shatters her ego, since she's been told that people must empower her, uplift her, etc. She will look at this incident as abusive or controlling, when it's really just about the man trying to assert his boundries.

Well said. We're talking about a generation of women that have truly had their ass kissed their entire lives by men. Hell, "open relationships" are becoming more common, which is secretly code for "Hey, I'm going to take dick and cum from other men, but you need to be her to kiss me goodnight on my forehead, where I just wiped the cum off of", and dudes are accepting this arrangement. They have no concept of boundaries. Even if on some level they respect it, their egos are so inflated on average at this point that it can override any respect you've generated from her.

Civilize the mind but make savage the body.
01-31-2020 12:13 AM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 1 user Likes nek's post:
Graft
WorldTraveler Offline
Pigeon

Posts: 3
Joined: Jan 2020
Reputation: 0
Post: #16
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
I can see where you’re coming from. Obviously it’s a case by case basis but I have had relationships that are similar to what you described. Around 3-5 months I guess seems to be the honeymoon period where both people completely obsess about the relationship. After that, that’s when either the passion starts to fade, someone gets cold feet, or they actually end up together for the long haul. Personally, in my own cases, I was the one being dumped due to her lack of interest. It’s just a test of time.
01-31-2020 09:18 AM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
gework Offline
Pelican
****
Gold Member

Posts: 1,551
Joined: Apr 2017
Reputation: 78
Post: #17
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
I've read there is a hormone called oxytocin that gets a considerable boost when you first get with someone you are attracted to.

This often wears off after about six months.

See: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3936960/
01-31-2020 09:32 AM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Samseau Offline
Owl
******
Gold Member

Posts: 14,671
Joined: Mar 2010
Reputation: 293
Post: #18
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
(01-30-2020 04:19 PM)Rob Banks Wrote:  ↑ I'm not sure if society will "burn out" and revert to traditionalism anytime soon. I feel like the existence of modern technology kind of makes it impossible (or at least really, really difficult) for that to happen.

Nothing lasts forever.

Contributor at Return of Kings. You can follow me on Gab.
01-31-2020 09:59 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Leonard D Neubache Offline
Owl
******
Gold Member

Posts: 13,423
Joined: Mar 2016
Reputation: 216
Post: #19
RE: Why do most relationships seem to end after 3-5 months?
All modern day relationships have become highly transactional, not just the sexual ones. The moment the net-dopamine levels you provide someone drop below the net-dopamine levels someone else provides then it's "so long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, adieu".

This is a bitter pill to swallow for anyone who's still wired to weather the lows because they place greater emphasis on the (theoretical) long term outlook.

God demands of Man responsibility. God demands of Woman vulnerability. These are their curse and blessing alike. Libertianism is to Man as Feminism is to Woman.
01-31-2020 10:49 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 5 users Like Leonard D Neubache's post:
doc holliday, redbeard, kel, Augustus_Principe, Geomann180
Post Reply 


Forum Jump:


User(s) browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)

Contact Us | RooshV.com | Return to Top | Return to Content | Mobile Version | RSS Syndication